ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
