yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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