we have pet lesbian snakes
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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