Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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