I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
