this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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