Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
