Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
