he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
