Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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