Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
