If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
