I just saw a hot homeless man
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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