billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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