i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
