New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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