I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
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