garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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