i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
