And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
