Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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