so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
My ATM looks so different sober.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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