btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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