i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
