I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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