So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
