That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Randomize