Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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