if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
