just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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