roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
ugly people sure do ruin things
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
