if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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