I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
