I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Randomize
