It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
