My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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