either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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