whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
