Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
