so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize