Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
