Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
