i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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