I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
as a side note pls kill me
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
