So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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