If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
