that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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