It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize