how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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