I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He better not be in your backpack
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Randomize
