You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
All I want is dick and wine.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
