So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
