I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize